My 7-Year Itch Needs Scratching

The seven-year itch is a psychological term that originates from the idea that happiness in a relationship declines after around seven years of marriage.  In my case (with my first marriage) this was definitely true.  I married on my 21^st birthday and by the time I was 28, I was on the way to divorce.  However, I am glad to say I didn’t get the itch the second time round (and neither has my hubby) as we are now into year 14 of our marriage (big grins).

Nowadays, the seven-year itch is not only linked with unhappy marriages but can be related to anything that has shown a decrease in happiness and satisfaction over a long period of time.

For a number of reasons, this week I have been reflecting on my life and it is clear that I’ve definitely had the bug:

21 = Married – Stay at Home Mum with 2 Children - Divorced

28 = Single Life (and another failed relationship) – College – Career Building

35 = Married Again – Moved to the UAE – Bachelor’s Degree

42 = Still Married (J), Master’s Degree, Kids Moved Out, Became a Grandparent, Moved Back to Abu Dhabi (after living in Dubai for 7 years)

49 ????

So here I am at 49 years old with only 6 months to go before I’m 50 (jesus where have the years gone?) and I've decided that it’s time for another change.  Although this decision was sparked off this week by certain events at work (won't go into that).  But I also need to practice what I preach (literally).  As a trainer I often train stress management and am always telling me learners that they need to 'take control of their lives' and in particular the Circle of Influence which comes from the highly acclaimed author and motivational speaker and his book the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.  

Over the past few months I had already been thinking of taking up a new hobby.   The kids are gone, work is still ridiculously busy, I'm travelling all the time but one thing I'm not doing any more is studying.  So I decided to learn to play the guitar!  God knows why, but I thought it would be:

1. Easy

2. Fun!  

Well its neither.  But I'm probably being a bit defeatist as I've only actually tried to play it (well actually tune it) about 3 times in 2 months (May be I need to give it a little more time).

But again this week events have made me reconsider my situation.  Sometimes I just get fed up of  'people'.  I certainly don't mean my family and friends (god they are my saviours most of the time), but I just mean people in general - they get on my nerves!  And sometimes I need to take a break from it all and have my own space and not have people dictating and telling me what to do!  I'm 49 for god sake not 9! (sorry going off on one now).  Anyway,  I've decided I want to take up a new hobby which will do 2 things:

1. Easy

2. Fun

3. I may (in the future) be able to make money from it

4. If No. 3 works out then I can pack my job in and work by myself and not have to deal with 'People'.

5. If No. 4 doesn't work, then no worries I'll be doing something that I enjoy.

So I'm taking up photography and I can't wait.   I've always liked taking photographs and for anyone that knows me my house is full of photos of my family and friends and I love just taking my camera and clicking away at anything and everything that fascinates me.  I did sign up for an on-line photography programme a year ago but tbh it was boring and for me not very practical.  Therefore, I've registered myself on a beginners photography course with Gulf Photo Plus and have bought myself a brand new Nikon D3200 digital camera which I'm dying to start using.

Over the next few weeks, I'm travelling to Sri Lanka, Saudia Arabia and Australia so I'm sure I'll get some amazing pics and this is why I wanted to do it right by registering with a photography class and learning how to take the pictures properly.  

I'lll be sharing some of my pics on here and of course I have an Instagram page and now I'm on Twitter  @mandybillany (lol, still trying to work that one out).  So, let's see how it goes, wish me good luck.

Midlife in Full Swing!

OMG, I can't believe that it's almost 2 years since I wrote my last blog (where has the time gone? I ask myself). Sooooooo many things have happened that it's hard to remember everything (especially at my age).  

3 days ago I turned 49 and a very close friend of mine (who is also 49), kindly reminded me that I'm now on the download spiral to being 50 and that I needed to enjoy my last year in my 40s!

All I can do is think about how fast my life is going and wonder where all the years have gone!   Like most people my age, I still feel like I'm in my early twenties and it still shocks me when I think about certain events that have happened in my life and realise how many years ago they were.  I'm afraid of growing old(er), but then again, I count my blessings everyday that I continue to live my live to the fullest.

Mandy's Midlife Mayhem is a great title for my blog, over the past few years a number of major things have happened which have made me realise that, such as:

1. Completing my Master's Degree in Education
2. Becoming grandparents to 2 gorgeous grandchildren (1 girl, 1 boy)
3. Re-introduction of my old hobby 'knitting' brought on from point 2
4. The Menopause (or Perimenopause to be precise)
5. Finally losing some weight! (hooray!)
6. My youngest child moving out 

I finally finished my MA which Middlesex University in Dubai, in May last year with a Merit (2:1), which I was very pleased about.  Unfortunately I missed my graduation (which I was not pleased about), however, I had good reason to miss it, I was on holiday with my family in Thailand (which is a good enough excuse, but still disappointing).  Anyway, the holiday was fab and its always great to have a big family holiday, especially when we live so far away from them, its great to meet up and spend some quality time with them.

Hubby and I became grandparents for the first time late last year with the birth of 2 grandchildren (from 2 of our children).  Although 1 was planned, 1 wasn't, (long story), both of them are here now and both are absolutely adorable and we are 100% fully fledged grandparents (Grandma and Pops) and we're loving this new era in our lives.

The knitting was reintroduced very unexpectedly during a seminar at work (another long story). I used to knit huge amounts of things when I was in my late teens/early twenties (god what a geek I was).  It seems more appropriate knitting now that I have 'Grandma' status and almost 50! (still a bit geeky, but definitely more appropriate).  So far, I've knitted 2 baby blankets, 1 cardigan (which ended up in the bin) and cardigan number 2 which hasn't been worked on for a while and my grand-daughter has probably outgrown it already (Oh well its the thought that counts).

The Menopause

Well where do  I start?  Actually, I believe the phase I'm in is called Perimenopause.  Some of the symptoms us poor women have to go through (lovely, not!).

• Hot flashes
• Breast tenderness
• Worse premenstrual syndrome
• Lower sex drive
• Fatigue
• Irregular periods
• Vaginal dryness; discomfort during sex
• Urine leakage when coughing or sneezing
• Urinary urgency (an urgent need to urinate more frequently)
• Mood swings
• Trouble sleeping

Wonderful is it?  Anyway, I've been really proactive, changed my eating/drinking habits and finally found exercise that I'm enjoying (swimming and walking), which is helping with a lot of the symptoms.  Since mid January, I've been swimming 4 times a week (50-60 lengths) and walking on average 7-8,000 steps a day.  I've finally lost some weight (just over a stone so far) and I'm finally have a positive mindset regarding my diet which is keeping me really motivated.  

After being with my husband for almost 14 years, we are now enjoying living on our own with no kids in the house.  My youngest son, has now moved out and is living with his girlfriend, which means we have the house to ourselves (Hooray!!!).  I love my kids dearly, but eventually there comes a time when they need to spread their wings and LEAVE!    Some people told me that hubby and I would be bored of each other after a few weeks, but it is great and we're loving having the place to ourselves, and my son is just up the road so I know he's ok.

Finally, as a birthday celebration tonight Hubby and I are going to see Michael Buble playing live at the Dubai International Cricket Stadium (can't wait).  Will check in next week with feedback!

  

Great to be back in the deep blue ocean

OMG I cannot believe that it is almost a month since I wrote my last blog, what happened to the days when I was writing it every day? and how time passes by.  A lot has happened over the past month some good things some not so good.

First of all I'm currently in Jeddah on business, I arrived here this morning and will be here all week.  Two days ago I was in Oman.  Although we were officially in Oman, it is actually literally just over the UAE boarder.  We were visiting my son who is finally back here with us (well in Oman anyway).  He's finally returned from what I would call another wasted journey to Thailand (and Cambodia) but he would say otherwise, so we'll say no more.  Anyway it's great having him just up the road (well 1.5 hrs away) where he is close enough for me to keep an eye on him and not worry to death wondering where he is all the time.

Anyway, after almost 2 years break, hubby and I brushed off our diving gear, took a refresher course (led by James obviously) and had a couple of nifty dives on Friday afternoon.  It was great, I'd forgotten what fun diving is, and it was also great to get away from the city and my studies and catch some sun and fresh air.  He's working at a Nomad Ocean Adventures, its a lovely little place with accommodation so we were able to stay overnight on Thursday.  The staff there are very friendly, it's very clean and they have great food, for any divers out there I would recommend it (especially the instructor James lol).   The visibility was pretty good on Friday we dove 14.6 meters and 12.6 meters on the second dive, the water was a lovely 29 degrees.  We managed to see lots of marine life including my favorite, a small turtle.

The house is very quiet at the moment as my other son is also working away, this time in Singapore.  Bless him, its the first time he's worked away and I think that after over 2 weeks away he realises its not as glamorous as it sounds.  Hopefully he'll be back by the end of the week because we have tickets to the PDC Dubai Duty Free Darts Masters on Friday night and I know he'll be gutted if he misses it.

The diet is going OK, but I'm still looking for more sponsors.  I lost 6lbs in the first week then it seemed to start creeping up again (god only knows why). Anyway, I decided to kick the Dukan Diet into touch and try ANOTHER diet.  This time it is the Paleo Diet which is just a healthy way of living really cutting out most carbs but allows some.  Anyway, with the help of the Wii Active 30 day Challenge, I have lost 3 lbs this week, which is great but I still have loads to go (I'm so impatient, I just want to wake up one day and all the extra weight I'm carrying has just disappeared over night). Unfortunately, the 30 day challenge is going to go down the pan this week as I'm away from home, but I've already been in the gym tonight and will continue that all week (otherwise I will vegetate in the hotel room).  

I'm also keeping up with my Nike Fuel band and have achieved a 7 day streak yesterday which is great.  It's amazing how little exercise I actually get when I'm in the office all day.  Because of this, I'm working hard to make sure I reach my target each day and if I haven't done much during the day, I'm pushing myself to do the Wii Active 30 day Challenge (which I can tell you is hard going lol) and hubby and I are walking Charlie around the lake every day.

Speaking of Charlie, he's better now but one thing to remember, if you have a dog, they don't like Chinese food (especially onions lol).

As you know another friend of mine died last month which was really horrible.  Unfortunately due to various reasons I was unable to go back for the funeral but on the actually day I was very distraught.  I think in one way it was worse than hearing she'd died.  I think a funeral just finalises everything and its just sad.  But my BFF went to the funeral to pay our respects and said she had a lovely send off, which is nice.

Finally, I've made contact with an old family member (from my ex's side) who is visiting Dubai next month for a few days.  It's been a very long time since we last saw each other but as I've said before, life if far too short to bear grudges.  So, I'm looking forward to meeting her again.

Precious time spent with Friends

Hello, its been two weeks since my last blog and I don't know where the time has gone.  Oh yes I do, I've spent most of the time eating and drinking far too much!   The reason being, hubby and I have just had some very good friends over from the UK on holiday and needless to say we have spent the last 14 days out and about wining and dining them.  You name it, we did it (or as much as you can do in 2 weeks without bursting from the scenes).  The Links at the Montgomery Golf Club, The Terrace at Le Meridian (for a friends birthday), Dubai Marina Yacht  Club, Bateaux Dubai Dinner Cruise (where we ate Basil ice cream - I know sounds awful, but it was lovely and highly recommended), West 14th, The Terrace at Media Rotana, Brunch at Latitude in the Jumeriah Beach Hotel, and a nice little lunch at the Banyan Tree in Ras Al Khaimah.

Keeping in the flow of our recent holiday, we also had a lovely visit to Madinat theater where we watched 'Joseph and the Technicolored Dreamcoat'.  It was lovely (even though a bit weird - whenever did Elvis meet the Egyptians).  Anyway we had a great singalong and I just love seeing the kids singing on stage, everyone seemed to give 110%.  I had never seen the show before but didn't realise I knew most of the songs from it, it was great good fun!

We also visited the newly opened, "Dubai Miracle Gardens" which is a beautiful oasis in the middle of a lot of sand.  It was lovely to walk around (even though temperatures here are now in the late 30s/early 40s).  We even saw a bride and groom having their wedding photos in the gardens.  Again, nice for a visit, especially when guests are here.

This wasn't their first time our friends have to visit us here in the UAE, it was actually their 4th visit, but unfortunately, due to a number of reasons (mainly illness), they haven't been here since 2010.  They've had a great time and were  hoping that they would get an extra week here like they did during their last visit.  But unfortunately, there was no ash cloud to be seen lol.  We did experience an earthquake though last week (that's near enough).  

OMG that was a scary experience.  At the time I wasn't working in my regular office, but in another office on the 23rd floor of a tower block.  Within a few minutes of feeling the tremor (which came from the boarder of Iran and Pakistan and was 7.8 on the Richter scale), we had to evacuate the building.

My dog Charlie has not been very well this week and had to have a trip to the vet. However, after a couple of injections and a dose of antibiotics, he seems to be recovering nicely.

On another note, last Thursday, I lost another longtime friend.  We have actually been friends for 20 years and worked as barmaids together along with my BFF.  I have kept in touch with her all the time I have been out here and visited her on our trips home.  However, when we were on holiday, I had a number of messages from her family telling me she was seriously ill in hospital. Over the past few weeks the messages kept going but last Thursday she died (she was 44).  Once again this makes me really live my philosophy to the full, 'Live life today, as you never know what tomorrow will bring'.  Sending all my love and condolences to my friends family.

So, with that in mind, and going back to the fact that I have ate and drunk enough food over the past 6 weeks to sink a battle ship, I have decided that enough is enough and I am not officially on the Dukan Diet.  I am actually the heaviest I have ever been in my life and I know it can't go on (drastic action has to be taken).  I'm on day 3 of the Attack Phase and doing great (even back on the treadmill lol).  However, as always when I diet, I get to about 2 weeks down the line and I give in, but this time I know I need to keep motivated, therefore I have decided to do a sponsored diet and raise money for Cancer Research UK.  

I've set up my webpage and anyone can donate and help me raise money for this worthy cause.  Please check it out!.  I'll keep you updated with my progress.  Thanks.

http://www.justgiving.com/Mandy-Billany

Las Vegas, Elvis, Celine and a Hangover

Good evening everyone, I hope you are well.  I didn't realise that I have not written my blog for well over a month, but with everything going on, things just seem to have gone manic.  As there is so much to talk about, I've decided that today's blog will focus on phase one of our recent holiday to the States and Canada (god we've back over a week and I feel like I need another holiday lol).

Anyway, just over 3 weeks ago, hubby and I started out on our recent journey to Las Vegas via Los Angeles.  I would like to say the flight was pretty good (Emirates flights usually are), however for some reason I was ill most of the way.  God only knows what caused it, but I actually think I had travel sickness, which is not good (especially when you're having to kick little kids out of the queue for the loo to make sure there were no embarrassing moments), and 16 hrs on a flight is not great in that situation. However, hubby and I did manage to play just a few games of backgammon (I know how geeky are we?)  but as usual I thrashed him, even in my half ill state.

Unfortunately, our stay in Los Angeles was short and sweet with a quick stop over before catching the flight to Las Vegas (I did manage to take a photo of a LA cab though as evidence of being there).  When we flew over the Nevada desert it seemed to go on forever, and then suddenly hundreds and thousands of lights appeared and we had our first glimpse of Las Vegas.  I was even more gobsmacked when I saw all the slot machines in the baggage claim lol. We were conned straight away by a 'gentleman' offering us a taxi service from the airport to the hotel.  It turned out to be a limousine jeep which cost $45 dollars for about a 15 minute ride.



We stayed at the Planet Hollywood Hotel which is right in the middle of the Strip.  Our room what the John Travolta room which was based on his 1996 film, 'Broken Arrow' (not something I've actually seen).

I think I walked around Las Vegas with my mouth open wide for 3 days.  There is so much glitz about its unbelievable, and the hotels are MASSIVE!  However, we both agreed that although there is a lot of glamour, it doesn't have the sophistication of Dubai.  And of course the casinos are also amazing, obviously its very additive but I didn't realise that some people gamble at any time of the day.  This photograph is of the 'Flamingo' casino at 7 am!

Needless to say I had hoped that we would see 'Elvis' during our stay and we were not disappointed (see pic).  We also saw lots of other street entertainers, went in all the famous hotels, the Bellagio, Caesars Palace, The Venetian (the one with gondolas inside), The Mirage, Treasure Island, Cosmopolitan,  Paris and The Palazzo to name but a few.  All of which had massive casinos, wedding chapels and very expensive shopping.

But our main event of the stay was seeing Celine Dion  at Caesar's Palace, which was fantastic.  We had a great evening, but I was amazed to see that not many people dressed up for the occasion.  I was gutted, I dressed in my best sequined dress and Christain Louboutin shoes (fake obviously can't afford real ones lol).  Anyway, about half a dozen other people were dressed up and the remainder of the audience were quite casual, which I thought was a bit strange.  Am sure Celine noticed me in the audience as one of her outfits was very similar lol.  She was fabulous, classy, sophisticated and an all round great entertainer and having been fans of hers for many years we both felt privileged that we could see her perform live.

Before the concert we ate in one of the 3 'Gordon Ramsey' restaurants in LV, but afterwards when we walked back to the hotel, I was trying to act sophisticated in my very high shoes walking past the Bellagio hotel and its famous fountains, when I suddenly fell flat on my face (that's just typical of me).  Needless to say I got up very fast and mended my bruised knee back at the hotel.  Another night hubby and I went to see the 'Las Vegas Show' in Planet Hollywood which was really good actually quite interesting to learn about the history of LV.

Hubby and I did spend a few hours in the casinos but not been gamblers and also because we had no idea what to do, we spent most of the time on the slot machines.  But needless to say we found the cheapest ones to play on so it felt like our money lasted longer (lol).  We did eventually move onto the 'Wheel of fortune' and it didn't help when we realised that 'free drinks' were served continuously whilst you gambled. OMG that is lethal and after a few hours all I can say is we were lucky we only had a certain amount to spend (otherwise we would be bankrupt now lol).  When we woke the next morning  it was like a scene from the 'Hangover' (well may be not that bad).

So, overall a great time was had by all in Las Vegas, highly recommended for a few days and if you have lots of spare cash to spend.  Our next stage of the holiday was 'Banff' in Canada.

Flash back to the 80s and beyond, but looking to the future

Last year at this time, I went to see Duran Duran in concert which was fab as I was always a massive DD fan.  Last night a group of us went to the 80's Rewind concert at DFC, where we were entertained by T'Pau, Heaven 17, ABC, Howard Jones and Rick Ashley.

What a great night it was, honestly there is a lot to say for the aging groovers with a combined age of 268 they rocked the stage and all of them still have pretty good voices.  

Carol Decker (57) from T'Pau opened the show and I must say she's still got it and it was great to hear all the oldies again.  

Martin Fry (55) of ABC was great it was agreed that he definitely still has rhythm and can move well.  

The worst act of the night (from my point of Heaven 17), honestly watching a 54 year old bald guy in a pin stripped suit doing a grandad dance on stage is not really my idea of entertainment.  However, I must say his backing singer had a marvellous voice.  It was also probably because I only knew one song of theirs 'Temptation'.  

Howard Jones (55) was pretty good, but my favorite just had to be Rick Ashley (47).  OMG he still has it, he was great, and looks fab and doesn't look a day over 25.  I really enjoyed the whole night and was lovely to see some of my favorite artists from when I was a teenager.  The only problem is it makes me feel old, but then again always a week before my birthday I start to worry about my age.

This year however, I not only have my birthday but its also going to be mother's day (in the UK anyway).  which is a bit of a bugger but there you go.

So all the holiday is now booked and our itinerary is set, hubby and I are getting very excited, Celine Dion in Las Vegas, ski passes and equipment are sorted for Banff (and I can still get my ski gear on which is very surprising), and going to see the Jersey Boys on Broadway whilst we're in New York, so very excited.

I'm trying to look on the positive side a bit more as I know I've been feeling sorry for myself just recently, but honestly some people really annoy me.  The other night, hubby and I were in Burger King (I know we're so bad, 2 weeks before our hols).  Anyway, we were there and whilst we were waiting for our meal ad family of 4 knocked over a cup of coke.  Now what do you do when you knock something over?  Instinctively you would rush to get stuff to clean it up wouldn't you?  Well not these people, they just sat there and clicked their fingers at the staff to clean it up!  OMG it made my blood boil, they just carried on starring and stuffing their faces whilst the poor girl cleaned up around them (lazy buggers).

Hubby and I have been watching a number of really good British period dramas, 'Call the Midwife', 'Mr Selfridge', 'Ripper Street', and the 'Magdalene Sisters' (which was actually horrendous - but good if you know what I mean)  all very good programmes and well worth a watch.

My daughter and son-in-law have just booked to come and see us in the summer and hopefully if all goes to plan another couple of friends of ours will be here in early April, so something else to look forward to.  

Finally, my recently bereaved friend's son and his girlfriend got engaged on Valentine's Day and have booked the wedding for early next year which is great news.  Unfortunately, his dad won't be there but I am 100% certain that he would have been very proud of his lovely son and future wife.

No Shopping Allowed

Hi everyone, sorry its been quite a while since my last blog (almost 3 weeks I think). During my last blog, I said my mojo had gone into hibernation, and although it came out for a while, its hovering back on the brink disappearing forever.  I had some disappointment a couple of weeks ago which has knocked my confidence a bit and it is taking me a while to get back to being myself.  But I know I should stop feeling sorry for myself and sort myself life could be a lot worse, so I'm trying hard not to be negative.

I currently in Kuwait on business and to be honest as business trips go it's going quite well.  However, I have not done what I intended to do which was to spend some time in the gym at the hotel.  Honestly, I'm really bad, I have spent so much time sitting on my backside surfing the Internet and played 'Bejewelled' on FB I am sure I am going to end up with bed sores by the end of the week.  I'm so bad, how will I ever lose weight or get fit?  But it seems the more I don't do, the more I can't be bothered! (does that make sense?).  I've promised myself though that as soon as I get back to Dubai I will DEFINITELY spend the next 3 weeks working my butt off to get fit.  (Oh god, 3 weeks before the big vacation, that's not long is it?).  At this rate I will be rolling down the mountains in Banff.  On a positive note, I have had the chance to work on an assignment for my MA (which is due in next week).  And when I'm stuck in a hotel room for 4 days it really gives me the opportunity to study hard (when I'm not on bejewelled obviously).

So, last week I had two of my very good friends over for holiday from the UK.  One of my friends is the widow of my recently deceased friend and the other is her sister, I took 3 days of work to spend time with them as they only had 6 days with us.  However, it was great to spend time with them and I am sure they both needed the break very much.  They spent a lot of time in the garden just relaxing and enjoying the sun (honestly, by the time they left they had great tans). but I'm not much of a sunbather so I topped up a little.

We also spent a lot of time eating (honestly, I will never be thin!).  We ate out almost every day at least once, if not twice.  One special day was having 'high tea' at the  Ritz-Carlton, Hotel on JBR (oh it was lovely).  We also had evening brunch at Yalumba in Le Meridian Hotel whilst my hubby and our friend had a cooking lesson.  (This was a Christmas present from me to them).  Actually, it's probably me that should have the lesson as my hubby and our friend are actually quite good cooks.  Anyway, they had a good time and enjoyed cooking the 3 course meal.  We were all disappointed that we didn't get to taste some of the food.

Apart from eating we did do a few touristy things and actually went on a Dhow cruise on the creek which was pretty cool.   One thing we didn't do much of (actually we did it once for about an hour) was.... Shopping!  I know, (shock, horror), how can you come to Dubai and not shop I hear you say, but they are 2 of the very few I know that just don't shop!  So we went in MOE for about an hour and that was enough for the week lol.

The 4 of us also had the opportunity to visit, Cirque Du Soleil last week. (it's something I've wanted to do for a while and I wasn't disappointed).   It was a fabulous show and we all just sat there starring in amazement.  The acts were fantastic and it was difficult to decide who was the best as they all displayed excellence in their own area of expertise. 

At the end of the week we had some lovely news that my friend's oldest son had proposed to his girlfriend on Valentine's day (down on one knee and everything, bless him).  This was great news and hubby and I wish the lovely couple all the best for the future.